Donna doesn't have a prayer!

Donna
Song: Like A Prayer Download 'Like A Prayer' at iTunes Check out 'Like A Prayer' at Amazon.co.uk (Madonna Download 'Madonna' tracks at iTunes Check out 'Madonna' at Amazon.co.uk)

Donna's "Like A Prayer" leaves her without a prayer of a chance with the X Factor judges.
When 54-year-old Donna sings 'Like A Prayer' it sounds more like a Russian Orthodox requiem recital and Simon seems to think she's singing more like a mad Donna than a Madonna!
In classic flunkee style she turns to begging the panel for 'yes' votes. When crotchety Cowell tells her to stop saying 'please' Donna's brilliant reply is 'please'!
The begging fails so she tries singing "I have a dream", which in reality is more of a nightmare!
It's all getting too much for Sharon who calls for big Tony the bouncer whilst Paula cackles off the set in helpless delerium.
Simon eventually persuades Donna to leave and big Tony's services aren't needed. However Simon does promise Donna "we'll talk". Perhaps he wants to negotiate her rate for the rejects spot on the next X Factor tour!

Panel-Bites:

Donna speaks in the holding area, before her audition...

Donna: I want to be a solo artist, you know? A superstar, pop star. (Laughs)... I do believe I have some talent, so... but I'll wait for the judges to decide. (Making the 'X') I got the X Factor!

Donna's audition...

Sharon Osbourne:  Hello.

Donna: Good evening, judges.

Sharon Osbourne:  Good evening.

Donna: Thank you... My name is Donna and I want to be like Madonna... big as Madonna.

Simon Cowell:  Okay. What are you gonna sing?

Donna: Uh, I'm gonna sing Madonna's "Like A Prayer" Simon.

Simon Cowell:  Okay... All right.

Donna sings...

¯ Life is a mystery ¯ Everyone must stand alone ¯ I hear you call my name ¯ And it feels like home ¯ When you call my name ¯ It's like a little prayer ¯ Down on my knees ¯ I wanna take you there ¯ In the midnight hour ¯ I can feel your power ¯ Just like a prayer you know I'll take you there ¯ Heaven help me ¯

Simon Cowell:  Thank you, Donna.

Donna: Thank you. (Smiles)

Simon Cowell:  Amazingly, we've missed off the first part of her name with you, haven't we?

Louis Walsh:  "Mad". (Donna grimaces)

Simon Cowell:  I mean, seriously... Come off it! (Laughing) What was that?

Donna: Can I give you another song Simon?

Simon Cowell:  No!

Donna: Please.

Simon Cowell:  It's not a question of please, beg, compliments, anything... it's... it's just ridiculous.

Donna: Please. Put me through.

Simon Cowell:  (Incredulous laugh) For what reason?

Louis Walsh:  We can't, we can't. We cannot put you through.

Donna: Please.

Simon Cowell:  You've got to stop saying "please" because it's not gonna make any difference.

Donna: Please.

Simon Cowell:  (Irritated) No, stop saying please!

Paula Abdul:  (Cackles)

Donna: Please, Sharon, think about... as a lady.

Paula Abdul:  (throws her head back and laughs uncontrollably)

Donna: Please Louis?

Louis Walsh:  No!

Donna: Can I give you another song, Simon?

Simon Cowell:  (Spins in his chair and throws his hands up) No!

Donna: ¯ I have a dream, a song to sing ¯

Simon Cowell:  Now this is ridiculous. Donna, I'm tired and gettng irritable. I'm gettng a headache.

Donna: ¯ To help me cope with anything ¯

Paula Abdul:  (Laughs helplessly. Unable to take any more she walks off the set)

Donna: ¯ If you see the wonder ¯

Sharon Osbourne:  Donna... Donna, have you met Tony?

Shot of Paula sitting off set, recuperating.

Donna: ¯ Of a fairytale ¯

Sharon Osbourne:  Tony wants a word outside.

Simon Cowell:  Donna, Donna, just... Donna just go, sweetheart. (Aside, to Sharon) We've lost Paula.

Sharon Osbourne:  (Laughs)

Simon Cowell:  Go, please.

Louis Walsh:  Bye-bye. Thank you very much.

Simon Cowell:  C'mon, Madonna, we'll talk later. Tony, stay there. We'll talk, we'll talk later. Thank you.

Louis Walsh:  Bye-bye.

Simon Cowell:  Thank you.

Paula cackles from behind the set.

Simon Cowell:  She's made her hysterical.

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